"After we've accepted ourselves and given ourselves a hug, we ask ourselves two questions:'What do I need to do to take care of myself?' 'What am I supposed to learn?'
Often, the self-care concepts we need to practice are basic:acceptance surrender realistic evaluation of what we can control detachment removing the victim dealing with feelings taking what we want and need seriously setting boundaries making choices and taking responsibility for them setting goals getting honest letting go, and giving ourselves huge doses of love and nurturing
Consciously focusing on our recovery program, talking to healthy people, plying ourselves with meditations and positive thoughts, relaxing, and doing fun activities help too.
We need to get our balance back.
Taking time to care for ourselves at work may require some different considerations than caring for ourselves at home...Self-care is self-responsibility.
Codependency is a self-defeating cycle. Codependent feelings lead to self-neglect, self-neglect leads to more codependent feelings and behaviors, leading to more self-neglect, and around we go. Recovery is a more energizing cycle. Self-care leads to better feelings, healthier feelings lead to more self-care, and around that track we travel.
Don't worry if you don't understand, or if you aren't ready to learn the lesson today, that's okay. Lessons don't go away. They keep presenting themselves until we learn them. And we'll do that when we are ready and the time is right."
"Toxic Shame" "Recovery Checklist" Main Coda Page Soul's Self-Help
as of September 24, 2000